Ask Auntie Duchess

Quality Butter & Mongolian Hordes

11/30/2014

Miss Anita writes:

Dear Auntie Duchess,

I am planning a trip across Asia and I have been reading your memoirs, My Life of Adventure, Science, and Baked Goods. I was wondering: Did you really fend off a Mongolian horde with a plate of scones? If so, what is you secret?

Totally Curious,
Anita

Dear Curious Anita,

Thanks you for reading my memoirs. In answer to your questions, it was a plate of biscuits and I had a butter knife with me as well. The secret to defeating Mongolian Hordes with a plate of biscuits and a butter knife is, as with so much in life, really high quality butter. If I have to explain further, you will never understand.

I hope this answers your questions and enjoy your trip.

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Grandma Gao's Lemon Curd on the High Seas

11/6/2014

3 Comments

As promised to Bard Judith, the Captain's recipe for Lemon Curd. Well, actually, the recipe is from the Captain's grandmother, the infamous pirate Grandma Gao.

Ingredients:

1 teapot full of Pu-erh
1 bottle of whiskey
1 lb loaf sugar
6 egg yolks & 2 egg whites
Juice of 3 lemons; grated rind of 2
1/4 lb butter

First, make a fresh pot of Pu-erh and pour yourself a cup, add whiskey to taste.
Next, wipe the lemons and rub the sugar loaf on the rinds so the sugar may absorb the rind oil.
Drink a cup of tea and whiskey.
Melt the butter in the top of a double saucepan.
Slowly add egg yolks and whites to melted butter, stirring constantly.
Add the lemon juice and the grated rind, then the sugar.
While these dissolve, you should have a cup of tea and whiskey.
Allow the mixture to simmer, not boil, stirring all the time.
This can be exhausting and you may need another cup of tea and whiskey. When it is as thick as honey, pour into jars.
Allow to cool and when quite cold, seal well.
Finish the pot of tea and whiskey.

Grandma Gao was not only a fine cook, she truly enjoyed cooking...and whiskey.

3 Comments

Advice to the Adviceless & Troubled Tummies

9/12/2014

3 Comments

Oh, my most glorious Biscuits! It brings me, your Auntie Duchess, such great pleasure to help you with your queries concerning tea, life, and high adventure. I was recently contacted by a gentleman with a problem that it seems many people have.

The Gentleman's query is thus:

"Dear Auntie Duchess,
I am a devout coffee drinker, black. While I enjoy my coffee, I find myself with stomach issues. I have heard tell that tea is often used for stomach problems. What teas would you recommend for someone with a less than discerning palate?

Sincerely,
The Coffee Gentleman"

Dear Coffee Gentleman,

An excellent question you have there! I have even left off the task of ridding my kitchen of pixies to answer you. First of all, while I am wise and well-traveled, I am not a doctor. Now, to the answer.

What you want are teas with mint in them. Or, even better, herbal infusions with mint. I love a good spearmint or peppermint tea when my stomach becomes upset after hearing about the latest news reports. Tea Punk Teas carries an exquisite herbal infusion, Serene, which contains spearmint as well as other herbs that help one relax. Relaxing is also key to helping stomach problems. This is why My Dear often hides the newspaper from me.

I also recommend drinking less coffee, of course. You may want to try a good strong black tea, for example, English Breakfast or Russian Caravan. While they contain less caffeine than your average "Cup o' Joe," they are also easier on the stomach and, if you ask Auntie Duchess, taste better than many coffees.

Enjoy your tea and let me know of I can help you in any way!

That goes for all of you lovely Biscuits out there! Feel free to ask your Auntie Duchess anything at all regarding tea, life, or adventure. Also, if any of you know a good way to get pixies out of a kitchen, please let me know. These little winged trouble makers keep eating all the lemon curd.

3 Comments

Quality Butter & Mongolian Hordes

Grandma Gao's Lemon Curd on the High Seas

Advice to the Adviceless & Troubled Tummies

Auntie Duchess

Civility in Every Cup